Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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