You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
