dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Randomize
