Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
