I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
