And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
