why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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