Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
