is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Success! We fucked roommates!
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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