you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
