my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
