Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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