Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
you never un-have a 4some
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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