I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
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