is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Randomize