Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Ladies don't puke and tell
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
