I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
