Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
