would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
