I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
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