discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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