He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
