Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize