when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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