We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
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