That's intense
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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