they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
