So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
