I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
