Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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