i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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