I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
