he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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