We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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