i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
