Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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