apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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