Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
