I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
honey bunches of taint.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
