After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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