just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
