i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
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