You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Randomize
