Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
