my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Randomize
