Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club đ
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Liz Cheney wasnât exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying âYAS QUEENâ for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
