whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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