Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
