Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
