Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Randomize
