She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize